Chapter 16: For Now

It had been about 3 weeks since we had gotten back from LA. Things were going great between me and Geno, but I couldn't help but have my doubts. I hadn't trusted or counted on somebody in a long time. I had been so independent for so long, that I didn't know if I could let somebody take care of me. I'm not sure when my intentions changed. I don't know how I got from slightly satisfied about getting some male attention to craving his touch, the sound of his voice, or his company. And I know how many women want him. I've went out with the guys enough times to see a million different, equally beautiful women faun over him. And what would happen to me if one night, he decided he wants one of them instead of me. I know that he chose to be with me, but I am realistic. My looks compare nothing to those women's. Or what if he is completely satisfied with me, or better yet even loves me, and the media finds out that I lived at a foster home. Where would that leave me? Or what if his family absolutely hates me. I'm not sure he can even manage to make time to devote to me. I couldn't help these thoughts from entering my mind as I watched him give his post-game interview. On our way back to the home, he spoke up.

"Hey, what's on your mind? You have been quiet since the games been over," he questioned.


Damn... Why does he always have to be able to tell when something is bother me.


"Nothing," I replied with my best fake smile. He sat there for a minute, so maybe he believed me...


"Want to try that again?" he asked with a small smile.


"I was just thinking," I answered vaguely.


"About..?" He pressed on. He sat there patiently while I tried to put words to the thoughts that were running around in my head. I knew they wouldn't be easy for him to understand. I think part of the reason I loved his personality so much was that he didn't know how much the fans loved him. He didn't realize how all the women dreamed to be in my position, or how every young boy wished they could be him when they grow up. He didn't understand any of that, so I knew he wouldn't understand where my insecurities were coming from. But I had never lied to him, and I wasn't going to start now.


"What happens when you get tired of me, and you decide you want one of those extremely beautiful and wonderful women that throw themselves at you all the time..." I said quietly while keeping my eyes locked on anything but his.

Geno's POV

I knew something was wrong with her as I was doing my interviews after the game. Normally, she would stand over in the corner and watch my every move, smile my way occasionally. Now when she looked at me there was no smile. All I saw was sheer terror. I tried to let it go, but I couldn't take it any longer when we finally made it to my car. I had to know what was wrong. Had to try and fix whatever was bothering her.



When I finally got her to spit out what it was that had her upset, I could only laugh to myself. How could I get tired of her? How was I suppose to show to her that this wasn't just a phase I am going through. I had no idea how I could even begin to describe what I felt for her. I couldn't even explain it to myself, how was I suppose to make her believe it? The moment I laid eyes on her I knew that she needed to be saved, and that I could possibly do that. How could I make her see in herself what I see everyday. I didn't know if I could find adequate words for what I felt for her, but I had to start somewhere.

"How can I even pay attention to those other girls, when all I seem to want is you," he replied with a sigh.

She finally looked up at me instead of out the window. "For now," she replied as a tear rolled down her face. I pulled into the drive way seconds after that. As soon as I had stopped the car she got out. I knew that holding her there against her will would only make things worse, so instead I got out of the car myself and made my way into the house where I already saw her on her way up the steps toward her room. I sigh and make my way to the couch where I wait patiently for about 10 minutes before going after her.

When I reached her door I didn't hear crying, so that was a good sign. I went ahead and knocked, but she didn't answer. That was so like her...

I figured I would find the door locked, but as I turned the door knob, and it pushed in, I couldn't help but feel relieved. I glanced around her dark room, but didn't see her anywhere. It was then that I looked outside and saw her standing against the railing on the balcony. I made my way to the door and opened it. I just went and stood next to her, knowing that in time, she would open up and talk to me. In the meantime, I would have no problem spending the rest of this night with her out here looking at the Pittsburgh skyline.

Ty's POV

I knew he would come after me. And part of me wanted him to. That's why I left the door unlocked. But as he is standing here next to me, I cant seem to open up and tell him what is really on my mind. No matter how much I want to, I can't let him in 100%. Realizing that he is just going to stand there until I take initiative, I know I have to start somewhere.

"I'm sorry," I whisper while keeping my eyes on the city.

"I've been patient, but I don't how much longer I'll be able to wait for you to open up completely with me Ty. I know people have hurt you in the past, but at some point you are going to have to see that not everybody is out to hurt you. And as much as I hate to even bring this up, I'm not your mom..."

I turn to face him before I speak, and he reluctantly looks back. I know it hurts him for me to still keep him on the outside. "I know," I answer softly. "And I know you care about me, I just have problems believing it sometimes. I'm always doubting myself when it comes to you."

"I don't know how else to show my feelings for you. Sometimes I don't even think I understand completely how much you mean to me."

I can only reply by sighing and looking deep into his eyes, and will him to see the words I can't seem to make my tongue form.

It's then that he leans down and kisses me. Yes, I've kissed him before. But I don't think I've ever let myself feel this. My body wanted to give in to his advances, as it always does, but my mind was a little uneasy. My body eventually won the fight as I felt my arms reach around his broad shoulders and hold on while he picked me up and carried me into my bedroom before laying me down on my bed.